April 2006- Click here to see the creation of this work.

I came up with this idea after watching an episode of the television show "Malcolm in the Middle". The plot centered on the funeral of an elderly family member who died in her home. Before she was discovered, her pet cats ate portions of her body, in particular her face. It was hilarious. I toyed around with having my face already missing in this painting, but decided to leave that conclusion to the viewer’s imagination. Even if the viewer doesn't come to this conclusion, I hoped to show a touching moment between my cat Bernini and myself. Bernini is my oldest "child". I have painted our other cat Bacon and even a cat we baby sat for a few months, Louie, but never Bernini. I wanted to paint her now because I feel/felt like my relationship with her and all of my pets for that matter will change with the arrival of my first human child. I expect my relationships with them will change because they will be put into perspective. I currently consider them children, so I expect to find this a foolish and somewhat empty idea come this fall. I think this image is also a kind of goodbye to bachelorhood. Yes, I have been married for many years now, but I never really felt my life changed much as a result of marrying. I believe having a child will be an undeniable change. The view I depicted of our apartment is in my opinion very bachelor-esque. We have large leather furniture and our entertainment area is very masculine. I think had I not married, I would have ended up like this. The title however refers to my acceptance/understanding I will die. I know this acceptance isn't really complete, but I know I am entering into a new sphere/stage of life which brings me one step closer to dying. I don't expect to actually die alone, but I do expect it to be a singular animalistic experience that will be no different than my pet's experiences of death.